Please Don’t Poop Where I Read

Norton has decided to start pooping under my hammock.  Mom thinks it’s funny.  The poor little fellow doesn’t want to poop in the blazing hot sun.  He needs shade to do his business.

However, I fail to see the humor.  I like to read in the hammock and occasionally fall out of it.  That’s supposed to be a reading zone, not a pooping zone.

Maybe I should post a “No Pooping Zone” sign.

My Letter of Apology to a Plant

 

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Dear Household Plant,

Please don’t give up and die.  Please keep fighting for survival.  We (the Thaler family) enjoy your wonderful smell and appreciate your fly repelling capabilities.  We apologize for not taking proper care of you.  For whatever we did wrong, we are truly sorry and we promise to make amends.

Did we give you to much water or not enough water?  Did we allow you to spend to much time in the sun, or not enough time in the sun?  Did we fail to give you the appropriate plant food?  Was there something else you desperately needed from us and we failed to provide it?

Since you are unable to speak, we have called an expert to answer theses questions.  We promise to do better in the future and provide for your needs.  We desire for you to be a thriving member of the house, so please don’t die.

Love,

The Thaler Family