The Black Hole of Death

Today is Aaron’s birthday.  It should be spent having fun, singing, and laughing.  However, Aaron died three years ago.  There will be no signing or laughing today.

When Aaron died, I lost my brother, Gwen lost her father, and Mom lost her son.  His death created a black hole in our family.  This black hole creates a suction that drags feelings of joy and happiness into it’s abyss.  It only leaves feelings of despair and grief.

Our family will never be the same without Aaron.  His death will impact all of us for the rest of our lives.  I just wish we could somehow banish the black hole from our mist.  That we could learn to laugh and sing again.

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17 thoughts on “The Black Hole of Death

  1. How very sad for you all Lynn but know that your brother Aaron likely is at peace, resting and awaiting the day you are all reunited. He most likely enjoyed life while on earth, being able to see his daughter born and having such a great family. He is not gone from you, his spirit lives on in you all.

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  2. Hugs. I lost my brother December 19, 2016.

    This time of year, he would have finished his annual visit with me. It was an event I looked forward to.

    Though our interests and political views were very different, we shared love of family and our pets. My cats thought he was wonderful (he played kitty games with them), and showed recognition and excitement when he came to visit. I’m glad I made videos of them all playing together.

    He had a full pure white beard, and little children would run up to him and call him Santa even though he was in blue jeans and a Nebraska Huskers t-shirt! (I witnessed it!)

    Hugs and know that you will always feel the loss, Lynn, but you aren’t alone as long as you have your family and friends.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Aaron and I were different in many ways, but we still enjoyed each other’s company. Most of the time anyway. 🙂

      I am sorry to hear about your brother, it is a difficult thing when a sibling dies.

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  3. Don’t weep because it’s over, smile because it happened. Aaron would want you to be celebrating his life. We lost a dear brother 40 years ago and still remember him fondly. Sending hugs.

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  4. Thinking of you… Hold on to the good memories, and I know you have many. I have a brother who became “lost” to the family over 25 years ago, as he voluntarily “divorced” everyone. I haven’t seen him in all of that time, and he even refused to come to our mother’s funeral. So sad, and I think of him often…. You will be in my thoughts and prayers.

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  5. You are right. Your life and family will never be the same without Aaron. However, that doesn’t mean that it can’t be good, fun, and happy. In time, you will be able to laugh again. I know it is different, but, after my husband died, I remember the first day I laughed at something. I really didn’t notice, but someone standing by said, “It sure is nice to see you smile again.” I immediately stopped and shut down, wondering to myself how I could be happy when he wasn’t here. But, here I am, 11 years later, and I have a good, happy life. I pray that your family finds a way, in your time, to have joy again.

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